We Got That Slushy Shit

You know how the socially acceptable level of public complaining increases whenever it rains? How every conversation you have seems to revolve around the next five days of weather forecast? Well, I just wanted to say you'll never catch me groaning about rain, especially on a Sunday, because there are few things I love more than a rainy Sunday. I do hate it when it starts rainy and then turns all blue-sky on me, though. Once I'm in the mood to bake bread and watch movies, it's really annoying to suddenly feel like I have to go outside. But a real downpour? Ugh, I love that.

You know what I do not love? Slush. Last week in Kaslo: piles of snow literally taller than me, beautiful powder for skiing, the need to wear my artic Sorel boots for a walk to the grocery store. This week in Kaslo: slush EVERYWHERE. I know I'm kinda being a weather-complainer here, but slush is just so pointless. There's no fun 'slush' activities. No slush men (or slush people). No slushball fights (haha, wow, but wouldn't it be a million times funnier to see someone hit in the face with a slushball instead of a snowball?) Not really amazing to ski in the slush. So, slush? I adore your powdery cousin (snow), but you're just not really what I'm looking for.

This week I have been cooking up a storm. Sourdough buns with caraway seed (caraway keeps making it into a lot of my meals...eggs, buns...OK, mostly eggs and buns). A fresh batch of kimchi that I accidentally made too spicy, kefir. Kefir is one of those foods nobody I know had ever heard of, like, two years ago. But now, since everyone's talking about 'gut health' (talking a little too much about it, actually), kefir is literally all the rage. If you don't know what kefir is, it's fermented milk-tastes like sour yogurt. I know, sounds great, right? If you like buttermilk, you'd love it. If you like buttermilk that's gone chunky, you'd really love it! I actually really love it. Plus, apparently it helps you to have a good 'colony' of bacteria in your gut (anyone else grossed out by the thought of a 'colony' of bacteria?) Jordan and I were watching a little video about the difference between kefir and yogurt (nerd alert!), and the 'scientists'-who I'm sure were just actors in white coats-kept saying kefir is better for your gut than yogurt, has like ten times more bacteria, yadda yadda. I don't know about you, but I feel like we're getting a little lazy with anatomy terms these days. In other words, everybody stop saying 'gut.'

I tried to smile normally, but I was too excited about these sourdough buns. Holy shit were they ever good. I ate like three of them and promptly got a stomachache. Is that supposed to be two words? Waaaay too lazy to look it up.

Kimchi-a true staple in my house ever since 2006, when I lived for a little while in Korea. Wanna hear some interesting facts about kimchi? Well, you're gonna! I reeeally like random facts. *Disclaimer: any info that sounds like it came from a random Google search did come from a random Google search-nobody cares where I got this info from though, right? 1) The average Korean person eats about 40 pounds of kimchi a year! 2) There are officially 187 types of kimchi (but more, really, because you can 'kimchi' anything). 3) During the SARS outbreak, apparently Korea was less affected than neighbouring Asian countries, and many Koreans attributed this to the fact that they eat loads of kimchi. 4) Kimchi is ridiculously good for you. 5) In Korea, most houses have two fridges-a regular one, and a kimchi one! 6) In the olden days (I don't feel like looking up the exact year), kimchi was stored in earthenware pots called 'onggi' and buried underground. 7) Kimchi breath is a thing. 8) Kimchi was not always spicy (and not always red)-I believe it was Portuguese sailors that brought red pepper to Asia in the 18th century or something (again, too lazy for exact details here...come on, it's Sunday!) 9) Kimchi has been to space! The first Korean astronaut brought it both for something to eat as well as for scientific research on the bacteria it contains.

The days before Slushville. Look how happy!

On Thursday, I went with my nephew to Whitewater (a ski resort in Nelson). Whitewater is quite a nice ski hill, with three chairlifts, a really quaint lodge where they serve actual food that is actually good, and a lot of Australian people working there. I'm not judging (seriously!), but why are there always so many Australian people working at ski resorts? I've always wondered about this, especially because I don't think there is a lot of skiing in Australia. Anyways, just an observation. We had a lot of fun skiing. I mostly stuck to the green run called 'Little Mucker,' where quite a few instructors were teaching kids to ski. Kids are amazing on skis. Even when they've never tried it before, they don't seem to mind the idea of barreling down a hill with a stranger giving them vague tips. 'Now, remember, car seat!! Car seat!! No, that's a snow plow!' I felt sorry for one instructor who was having a terrible time with the kid she was teaching. The kid was clearly freaking out, she was scared of the hill, and also she was furious with her instructor. Screaming, crying, and veering away from the instructor yelling, 'GET AWAY FROM ME!!!!' A lovely day on the slopes. I learned that my quads are really weak.

Also this week, it was Robbie Burns Day. To be honest, I didn't know this was a 'day,' but more than one business in town was celebrating it, so...yeah. It's Robbie Burns Day! I chuckled to myself that we call this guy (who lived in the 1700's) 'Robbie.' I'm pretty sure in the 1700's he would have been more of a 'Robert,' but we'll let it slide. At the Bluebelle, they had Celtic Kitchen come to play some live music, and there was a 'toast to the haggis.' Haggis is oats and other weird stuff cooked in a sheep's stomach, I think. I'm not judging. But it is a little bit weird. I was planning on going to the Bluebelle, but Jordie and I got distracted and went to the Legion instead. I love going to Legions. They always have cheap drinks, you have to take off your hat (I like this tradition!), and there's always something random happening, like a meat draw. In fact, there was a meat draw on Friday. Somebody from our old curling team won a kilogram of bacon! There didn't seem to be a fridge around-he just put it on the table. We bought a bunch of those pull tab things and had a drink at the bar. I think some of the guys in the bar could tell we weren't true Kaslovians, because they asked us where we had just come from. Some guy kept talking about Newfoundland, but he kept calling it 'NewfoundLAND.' Another guy at the bar told us the reason (allegedly) that you don't wear a hat in the Legion. He said that back in the day (I don't know when, really), there was always a Legion on military bases, and they wanted the drinking establishments to be spaces where all the soldiers were equals. Military hats had a person's rank on it, so without their hats everyone was considered equal. This might be a total load of shit, but I thought it sounded like a pretty plausible reason.

Saturday evening, Jordie and I found ourselves again at the Legion, this time for the Ladies' Auxiliary appreciation dinner. The Ladies put in a hell of a lot of work to feed others, so it was really nice to be cooked for. We had roast beef, corn, carrots, dinner rolls, salad, baked potatoes and really good gravy. And raspberry chocolate cake. Our next Ladies event is going to be a Chinese-inspired dinner to celebrate Chinese New Year. Apparently one year the Ladies made their own fortune cookies. Sounds like a lot of work, but who doesn't love fortune cookies? I remember one time getting a fortune that said, 'Someone owes you twenty dollars, and they're going to pay you back soon.' So specific! Mmmm...baked potatoes and gravy. I should probably wrap this up and go get some breakfast.

Just wanted to give you a closer look at these Jenny Jones buns. I also made her cabbage roll recipe last night. Yum! Thanks Jenny!

Jordie and I decided to spend an afternoon in Nelson, what with the slushy conditions and all not being too conducive to skiing. Nelson has about ten thousand people, I think, and feels like a legit big city compared to little Kaslo. There's a Save-On Foods, a WalMart, nowhere to park, and actual traffic. Every time I go to Nelson, there are people talking about shamanism, goat butter, or teff flour. It's quite the town. At the Co-Op grocery store, I bought kefir yogurt (seriously good), sorghum flour, goat butter and black rice. I'm playing this game I like to call 'How Kootenay Can You Be.' It's where you buy a bunch of extremely hip stuff that didn't exist last year, and still doesn't exist in most places. And it all promotes healthy gut colonies. We went to the little tasting room at No.6 (it's a coffee shop but they like to call it a 'tasting room'). They were selling these cartons of oat milk that put all other oat milk to shame. The owner gave me a little shot glass of it, and I was like Bill Murray in that movie What About Bob? where he goes to Richard Dreyfuss' house for dinner and Richard Dreyfuss gets annoyed with him because he keeps going 'MMM!! MMM!!' when he's eating his corn. That is to say, it was great oat milk.

This week, I've also been thinking a little bit about Vancouver. Just a l'il bit. I guess because we are leaving Kaslo in 2 months. I think there will be a lot of things I will miss about this little town, for sure, but also a lot of things in the city that I didn't even realize I was missing, like our little apartment on Napier Street. Having lots of restaurant options (get ready Pho, here I come!). Jobs. Family. Friends. I don't know. I guess I'm just thinking about Vancouver a little.

Me in our apartment on Napier Street. Yes, I'm wearing pants. Well, shorts. Hi Vincent! What happened to your ear?

Me leaving our house on Napier Street. Just a casual, candid photo. Haha, no. Jordie made me do this walk like five times before he got the perfect shot. Well, whatever, not the 'perfect shot.' That sounds weird. Just a pretty good shot.

Me at one of those little book donation boxes near our house. I call it the bookstore. I'm always there.

If you can't find me at the bookstore on Napier Street, I'm probably at this other one.

Mom and Dad visiting us on Napier Street. My heroes, really.

Save On Meats-an East Vancouver staple. A greasy spoon where they butcher everything next door and have great milkshakes.

'Hey Jer, did you get new shoes?' 'Yup.' Just another noteworthy day in Kaslo, BC.

Skiin' the streets in the days before slush came to town.

Dinner on Napier Street. My brother Darren alerted me to this cool table that was sitting on the side of the road in Chilliwack about ten years ago. We went to load it into the car, and a man came out of his house and said, 'What are you doing with my table?' I don't think he knew about the thing where if you put something near the side of the road, people think it's free. I guess it is kind of weird when you think about it. Anyway, he said we could have this cool table if we also took a piece of crap table he had. We took both. I think we dumped the crappy one at my parents' place, but I don't really remember.

And now for my weekly tips on how to be more green. Away we go!

1. Pee outside.

Especially if you're camping-outhouses are pretty gross anyways. But if you do want to pee inside, and if you use toilet paper when you pee, at least don't use gobs of it (ladies, I'm most likely talking to you, but guys, I don't know how you take care of your bathroom biz so I could be talking to some of you too!) Confession: when it's just me and Jordie in the house, we don't usually flush every single time if it's just pee. Kind of a 'let it mellow' philosophy. Is this too much information? Whatever. I'm just trying to be honest.

2. Save vegetable scraps.

Celery ends, onion peels, you know the stuff. I read somewhere that these little guys are good for adding to soup broth instead of putting them straight in the compost with your dryer lint and masking tape.

3. Get your books from the library.

Or you could e-read if you like reading on a screen. That's gonna be a NOPE for me, though. I like paper books. It's really just not the same to snuggle up on the couch with my Kindle. They're not known for snuggliness. But yeah, instead of buying a whole load of books that you're only going to read once, why not grab them from the local library? Libraries are amazing when you think about it. Plus, they're always great for people watching. I think if it's a book your kids are going to want to read a million times, or one you will re-read like...oh, I don't know...Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter or Jenny Jones' new cookbook, it's nice to have your own copy of the book. But the pieces of crap you read only once? Library, man.

4. Wash your laundry with cold water.

Unless you have blood, vomit or some other biohazard on your clothes, I feel like cold water is prolly good.

5. Do a garbage audit.

I just read about this and it seems like a really good idea. I haven't tried it yet, but I'm planning to do it this week! All you have to do is get your garbage can(s), dump them in the middle of your kitchen floor, and see what you've been throwing out. It's so simple! I guess the idea here is that if you don't know what you're throwing out, you can't really produce less waste. I already know what's going to be in mine-plastic. We're trying to buy stuff that comes in glass or paper as much as we can, but Cornucopia sells these little bags of delicious, local greens that I just can't resist, and they come in plastic bags. I did ask at the store the other day if I can bring my own tupperware to fill with greens, and they said yes! Score! Will fill you in next week on what sloppy mess ended up on my kitchen floor.

So there you have it. Another week in lovely Kaslo, BC!